Picket Fence Post

This past weekend, my column on the plethora of inappropriately sexy Halloween costumes being marketed to young girls ran on the front page of the MetroWest Daily News’ Sunday Opinion Section.

It must’ve been serendipity because the very next day, I saw this photo of Miley Cyrus’ 9-year-old sister Noah dressed up for a Halloween party looking as though she’d donned one of the costumes I’d railed against as being bad for young girls and sending them the wrong messages.

The blog DListed had more photos of Noah in her costume which were just as stomach-churning as this one.

When I see these Halloween photos, along with teenaged Miley Cyrus’ recent pole dancing act at the Teen Choice Awards in August, I don’t feel confident in the message the Cyrus family is attempting to send to young girls, especially when my 11-year-old daughter’s a Hannah Montana fan.

Image credit: Juan Rico/Fame Pictures via Parent Dish.

Item #1: Slutty Halloween Costumes

From the moment the first catalogue for Halloween costumes arrived in my mailbox, I noticed that something seemed off, more so than in previous years. As The Youngest Boy leafed through it and circled a half-dozen costumes he was considering for Halloween, I couldn’t help but notice that a large proportion of the costumes for the girls beyond their toddler years, were sexed up, with the girls wearing obvious make-up and striking mature poses to make them look older, much more so than the boyish looking boys. I opined about this phenomenon in my October GateHouse News Service column.

Item #2: Fall TV Premieres

In the midst of the TV networks unveiling their slate of season premieres, I visited with the Manic Mommies and did a podcast with them where we dished about fall TV.  Shows we discussed included: Mad Men, Grey’s Anatomy, The Good Wife, Cougar Town, Glee and Parks & Recreation. You can download their podcast for free at iTunes or through other means. Go here for info on how to listen to the Manic Mommies online.

Item #3: Law-Breaker Moms

Three instances of states/municipalities trying to enforce over-the-top rules and regulations when it comes to the care of children:

How many of us have relied upon our fellow parents to help us watch our kids from time to time? How many have watched other people’s kids as a favor? Well if you lived in Michigan and you didn’t have a daycare license, you’d be a lawbreaker, according to media reports. Here’s the scoop from the local TV station, WZZM:

“Lisa Snyder, of Middleville says her neighborhood school bus stop is right in front of her home. It arrives after her neighbors need to be at work, so she watches three of their children for 15-40 minutes until the bus comes.

The Department of Human Services received a complaint that Snyder was operating an illegal child care home. DHS contacted Snyder and told her to get licensed, stop watching her neighbors’ kids or face consequences.”

In addition to Michigan criminalizing unlicensed ”it takes a village to raise a child” parents helping parents, folks who actually do run licensed daycare centers out of their Massachusetts homes were met with a host of new regulations by the state’s Board of Early Education and Care which will now consider daycare providers ”educators.” According to the Boston Herald, new regulations will mandate that daycare providers to do regular progress reports on children in their care which track “the cognitive, social, emotional, language, motor and life skills developments of infants and preschoolers,” brush the teeth of any kids there longer than fours hours and creative a an educational curriculum which demonstrates that daycare providers are offering “planned learning experiences.”

Meanwhile, a New York mother is being threatened by officials in Saratoga Springs because she and her 12-year-old son have been riding their bikes to his middle school. Riding or walking to school, according to the Times-Union, is banned — yes BANNED — by the school, at the same time we’re reading non-stop about the epidemic of fat kids who get little to no exercise:  “The Jackson street residents pedal more than four miles together each way to the middle school on nice days, despite being told not to by school officials and police.”

So, let me get this straight: You can’t watch your neighbor’s kids without getting a daycare license. If you get a daycare license, you have to become an “educator” and create curricula and conduct progress reports on babies. And if you’re trying to teach your kid about the joys of riding a bike to school, you’re told by the school and an awaiting state trooper that you’re breaking the school’s regulations and that you’ve got to plop your behind into a parent’s car or a bus seat.

Is it any wonder that parents feel under siege from governmental buddinskis?

The Eldest Boy wanted me to buy him a $45 LaDainian Tomlinson jersey so he could dress up as the San Diego Chargers star for Halloween over his football gear.

Initially, I said, “No.” (Actually, in my head I thought of a more colorful response.)

Then I gave the request more thought. The Eldest Boy hadn’t been thrilled with the birthday present he received from The Spouse and I back in August. (In fact, it’s still sitting in the box in our garage. We haven’t returned it because The Spouse and I can’t agree on whether it should be returned . . . long story.) So I suggested that I return his birthday gift and instead buy him the jersey for his birthday present, enabling him to dress up as Tomlinson for Halloween.

Only he didn’t like this idea. “But I don’t want to wear it after Halloween,” he said.

“You mean you only want to wear it for the two hours you’re trick-or-treating?” I asked.

“Yeah. I wouldn’t wear it after that.”

“No. (*pause, breathe*) Absolutely not. No way. I’m not spending $45 for you to wear something for two hours.”

While his birthday gift remains in the garage, I was finally successful in convincing him to dress up as another football player: Tom Brady. He could wear the jersey he already owns, over his own pads, and — best part – carry a crutch.

The Eldest Boy remains lukewarm to this costume. I think it’s funny, plus it didn’t cost us a dime, my favorite kind of get-up.

Now if I can just figure out how to put my own hair up into an early 1960s beehive for a Mad Men-style costume party for tomorrow night, it’ll all be good. (I’ve already bought nuclear bomb-proof hair spray.) I’m going for the look of one of the gals in the Sterling Cooper secretarial pool. The Spouse is aiming for Paul Kinsey, as The Spouse sports a goatee, a goatee which prevented him from dressing as the hunky Don Draper.

Image credit: Sport Station.